Netflix may soon surpass Disney when it comes to company value. But how did they get this way? Where the hell did they get the billions to piss away on mediocre original content and licensing movies not even good enough for the bargain bin? Well, we here at One World Under Dog did our due diligence in a writer's room and came up with these sources of capital which Netflix has been using.
Oligarchs from Russia
As far we know, they don't have pee pee tapes of Reed Hastings or Ted Sarandos.
Illegal accounts Wells Fargo set up for unwitting customers
Wait, you didn't know you had a mortgage account paying for 200 Netflix subscriptions?
Michael Cohen's personal equity lines
Ended up being for $130k less than originally agreed to, but that agreement was made six months before the 2016 election and Storms happen, man.
Tax cuts for not paying taxes
Where the hell do you think the Republicans got their 2017 tax cut plan, actual economists?
Their own Pizzagate operation
Like the Democratic leadership, Netflix realized child sex trafficking was more lucrative than just regular people sex trafficking and smuggling.
Selling lemonade at a roadside stand
Ha! Fake news! Everyone knows the local government would tax (steal) that money from them like they do to the little kids.
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