April 26, 2018

Michael Cohen's Other Secret Clients

Sean Hannity isn't Michael Cohen's only secret client, I mean, you can't be strutting your stuff around NYC smoking stogies if you only have a client list of three douchebags. That's why there has to be more. So, after some extremely non-tense, low-depth investigating, we've found others who are also on Cohen's secret client list.

Kermit The Frog
     Cohen is representing him in his divorce with Miss Piggy. Kermit told The Washington Post Miss Piggy started it by hiring Gloria Allred.

Kevin Spacey
     He actually approached Spacey first as he figured representing a worse President than Trump would be a good public relations move on behalf of the Donald.

Thanos
     What, you think Thanos was going to bother invading Earth without getting a lawyer first? Ha! Rule 42 To Defeating The Avengers: if kicking their asses doesn't work, drag those asses into court for years on end by filing numerous frivolous lawsuits.

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