All these people singing about dancing in the street when I don't see no dancing in the street. I see a dead squirrel in the street, but no dancing. Dead squirrel certainly isn't dancing seeing as he's dead and all. I mean, who is dancing in the street? And seems like kind of a stupid thing to do. Especially when there's traffic. Unless, say, it's David Bowie and Mick Jagger shooting a really bad music video for the song they're covering. Then traffic would probably come to a standstill as everyone wonders when David and Mick began dating. If you think that joke was better than the one Family Guy did on the same subject, please send me money.
Think Bill Cosby will even get the luxury of being offered drugs to pass out before he's raped in prison? And why has no one brought up the possibility of Cosby's son getting murdered due to all the raping America's Dad had been doing? Like, why is that not a conspiracy yet? Geez, no wonder The X-Files relaunch bombed. Conspiracy theorists are being forced into nihilism and apathy as the tidal wave of bullshit craziness that is actual reality drowns them.
Fuck May 4th being Star Wars Day just because it's fucking punny. No, Star Wars Day was and shall forever be May 25th. Because it was on that date in 1977 a nerd from San Francisco unleashed the behemoth which almost literally killed him. The first May 4th which happened after Star Wars originally released was in 1978. And even then it hadn't been out a full year yet. Is my nitpicking annoying you, ruing your May The Fourth Be With You celebration? Good! Because today is Cinco de Cuatro, you stupid idiots.
No comments:
Post a Comment